I came across this one before , but still find them funny.
Oxford Dictionary's latest definition of the following words:
Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Etc : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power...
Dictionary : A place where success comes before work.
Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
Opportunist: A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
Criminal : A guy no different from the rest.... except that he got caught.
Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.