Thursday, November 13, 2003

From the inbox: New meanings

I came across this one before , but still find them funny.

Oxford Dictionary's latest definition of the following words:

Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Etc : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power...

Dictionary : A place where success comes before work.

Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.

Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

Opportunist: A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."

Criminal : A guy no different from the rest.... except that he got caught.

Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.

No comments: