Running v2.0

I'm sure I've blogged about wanting to run again, sometime ago.

Anyways, since last year, I've started running again and this time I'm doing it for real - been joining run events around town at the rate of once every two months in 2014, and upping the rate to a minimum of once a month this year.

Sumpah best.

Ijurq triggered the first run that I registered for last year - it was a mere 5km fun run in the NMG Road Run series at Taman Tasik Titiwangsa. That was March 2014. Since then, I've joined many more events with the last one being 10k stint of 3R International Marathon last week. The longest distance I did so far was 15k in Energizer Night Race last year.

And I never thought I'd ever do this - but I did - have even registered for my first half marathon event and a 12-hour ultramarathon event, both in the coming September. And that beloved Towerthon thingy? Register for 2015 event - checked!

I guess I'm making up for the lost time. It just didn't occur to me somehow, to explore the world of running events locally in the last 10 years. I could have, but didn't. It took only the nudge of one person and one event - and now I'm running again, much much more than I ever did in fact.

Initially, I run for the rush of adrenaline, the inexplicable happiness of moving in a way that you're in control with, for those calories they burn and also for that nice shiny medal I can bring back at the end of the day. In addition, my running again has also bestowed me with another unexpected pleasant perk - a new set of great friends!

So, I'm really glad I agreed to that one fun run about a year ago. 

Running rocks!

The one about this hurt I feel inside

Love hurts, love scars, love wounds
And mars, any heart
Not tough or strong enough
To take a lot of pain, take a lot of pain
Love is like a cloud
Holds a lot of rain
Love hurts......ooh, ooh love hurts

Ah, being forgetful as I am, chances are, when I re-read this again a couple of years from now, I'm going to forget who or what exactly made me feel this way.

But for now, it hurts to realise how you've been deceived by your own foolishness into thinking you mean more to somebody whom obviously does not look at it the same way.

It's almost 2 months past since my birthday this year. 

A lot has happened since then. And didn't.

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Those who really know me will know how much birthdays hold a special place in my heart. I simply loveee celebrating not just mine, but others' birthdays as well. Oh I had a great time coordinating a number of birthday dos last time, indeed I did.

These days though, I will mostly brush birthdays off, save for family members and a few close friends. 

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Letting go is still one of the hardest things for me to do, although I do think I'm getting better at it now. God knows how many people I've let go over the recent years, and I found it was indeed the best to not hold on when the other party clearly don't care anymore.

I used to fight in those situations, gosh how much I used to fight to hold on even when things seem the darkest and bleakest and still hope for the best.

These days - I will just hold on  only as much as the other one does. And if they want to leave, chances are I will go and open the door myself.

For I have learnt that nothing is this world belongs to me, while everything belongs to the Almighty.

So who am I to cling on when He decides it's time for us to part ways for now or forever?

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Holler, and I will come if I could.

But only if I want to.

Use wikipedia much? Then this is for you, dearies.

If you go to Wikipedia page today or any other day, and notice a header seeking for donation, I do urge you to give something...even as low as RM10. Surely most of us can afford RM10, right?

Compared to how much Wikipedia has assisted us in our search for all sorts of information, trivial and otherwise...how many times have we wiki-ed for information, those times when we heard of something for the first time and needed more details, when somebody asked you something and you knew it once but may have forgotten, those tip-of-the-tongue moments, and so forth.

I would say RM10 is in fact, too little.

So, why should we donate to Wikipedia if after all, we google for information all the time, and Google is free, right? (Google make tons of money from advertising btw, wikipedia has no ads).

And we already paid for our whatever-speed-it-is internet!

Well, read below, which are the words of Sue Gardner, executive director of the Wikimedia Foundation.

Your donation covers not only your own costs of using Wikipedia, but also the costs of other Wikipedia readers.

Like the retired farmer in upstate New York who's using Wikipedia to study the science of sludge, and the student in Kuala Lumpur who's researching organic chemistry.  The British mechanic who, after he broke his back in an accident, used Wikipedia to retrain himself as a web developer.  The civil servant in Finland who set up an offline version of Wikipedia for a small school in Ghana. And the father in Mexico City who takes his little daughters to the museum on weekends, and uses Wikipedia to help them understand everything they're seeing there. 

Wikipedia's job is to bring the sum total of all human knowledge to everyone around the world in their own language. That's a pretty audacious mission, but with 30 million articles and 287 languages, I'd say that thanks to you and people like you, we are getting there. The fact that you are helping to pay the costs of running Wikipedia means it can stay ad-free and independent of bias, focused solely on helping its readers.   

Exactly as it should be.

So would you like to give back ? Click below :)

http://wikimediafoundation.org/wiki/Ways_to_Give/en

p/s - Yes, I'm starting to blog here again. Whee!

Hello, again

Wow. It has been so long.....so, so long.

I think I shall be writing here again :)

Cubaan

This, is a test for blogging via the blogger app.

eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

The concept of affordable memory erasing, so far, are only in movies.

Inadvertently though, over the weekend I found another way to replace those memories you wish to erase.

By : creating new memories of similar nature, somewhat, but with new elements.

And thus now should someone mentions road trip, I carry the freshest memories and let it run over the old ones.

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AM, IH, NIG, ZMN, II, F, and even 'Ayoh'

They don't know it, but they've made me a much happier person with the memories of their antics.

Terima Kasih Cinta @ Istana Budaya

"cinta, tegarkan hatiku

tak mau sesuatu merenggut engkau

naluriku berkata, tak ingin terulang lagi

kehilangan cinta, hati bagai raga tak bernyawa"

Cinta. Love.

L-O-V-E. That four-letter word that makes the world go round.

Last weekend I had the opportunity to catch the preview of Terima Kasih Cinta (TKC) at Istana Budaya. TKC is basically a musical adaptation of the 2006 movie CINTA by Khabir Bhatia, portraying five perspectives of love; with different facets, relationships and backgrounds. We have :-

• the married couple whose veneer of perfect marriage are shattered by their flaws
• the brother and sister who are at odds over their respective life choices
• the rich magnate and the bookstore help with the wide chasm of their socio-stand in way of love
• the carefree girl with a weighty baggage and the dorky nice guy who's fallen for her
• the forgetful gentleman lost in his past and the sympathetic lady who found a place in her heart for him.

As I've watched the movie version (and enjoyed it SO much!), there's no escaping the comparisons and expectations. Ya la, I'm only human kan. Since it's been quite some time, frankly I've forgotten some parts of the movie and thus was still able to relish in the more minute details of the whole story, as well as excitement/happiness/relief/wonder/sorrow of finding out what-happens-next in some of the scenes.

Anyways, as a musical theatre of its own, TKC has its strong points especially technically (crafty set, amazingly creative use of lights to intersperse several scenes at one go, cool change of props, beautiful play of colors, a very enjoyable song repertoire) - but where it really counts as a theatre performance, I find it just so-so. The main cast featuring a mix of well-known names and newcomers gave a mixed performance while honestly none of the couples really shone prominently above the others. Chemistry between them feels mostly a tad unnatural, forced even sometimes. Moments of raw emotions that I expected were few and far in between. I also found the narrating by supporting cast during certain scenes a bit irritating and unnecessary - I feel those 'nuggets' of information could've been weaved into the storytelling without having to resort to the somewhat childish and tacky 'announcements'.

Perhaps CINTA is just not meant to be made into a musical theatre. For me, theatre performances are supposed to sway you in the flow of the moment, from one scene to the next, building momentum until the climax and either end with a bang or..NO, theatre should ALWAYS end with a bang and leave one going, WOW. wow. oh. wow. oh.

Having five separate storylines means that there are FIVE different endings which proves to be a hindrance to the solid wow factor, which i suspect is the main reason the fulfillment fails as the audience will get a bit of each story, pause, next story, pause, next, pause, rinse and repeat. Although in the movie version the formula works fine, on stage this time it goes down a different way.

Perhaps my expectations were just too high.

Of the 10 main cast, I found Toni Eusoff (Harris) and Deja Moss (Dian) to be the most convincing, while the most not-believable (as in aisey macam fake sungguh) would have to be Aryana-Taufik (Nadia Aqilah & Vince Chong). The rest falls somewhere in between. Also watch out for members of the supporting cast, where there are a few attention-stealers and colorful characters that are sure to amuse.

What I would like to see in local theatre productions at Istana Budaya, of which lately seem to be invaded by the musical la-di-da bug ever since Puteri Gunung Ledang was such a hit, are theatre performances where people actually deliver their lines out loud while acting in characters that do not need to break into a song or dance at every 10-minutes interval. The kind that will make me leave my seat deep in my thoughts of what I've just seen or swayed by emotions from a solid wow-bang ending, where when the curtain call comes I'd feel that a standing ovation is aptly deserved, rather than because the audience were only being polite in some cases. Yes, Malaysians can be polite that way.

Ah well, I'm digressing.

Terima Kasih Cinta runs until 6th March 2011.

For tickets and more info, go to http://apps.gua.com.my/terimakasihcinta

On Twitter at http://twitter.com/TKCinta ; and tag as #terimakasihcinta http://twitter.com/#search?q=%23TerimaKasihCinta

yet another new beginning

Formally received the good news today at work...alhamdulillah.

Just did some 'digging' and realized that it's EXACTLY one year (to the day!) of my first day starting duty at the current office, ain't that such a nice coincidence?

Truthfully, I did have some doubts when I was first informed of moving here. Which was to be expected due to leaving one's comfort zone for uncharted waters, what more in my position where I've been more or less quite out of the loop of things due to my previous postings and line of work. Lots of things in my mind that time, but as always I will gamely take on when faced with new options, especially those that promises bigger and better things at the helm. Hey, who wouldn't?

I'll have to admit apart from the initial minor hiccup, things have been going quite smoothly and in fact I daresay much better than expected. Which I owe a lot of to the people around here, as well as others in my life.

Work, studies, home, family, friends - makes the schedule of a Ted so, so full and exciting.
Some days more than the other. Some people more than the rest. Heeee. Just the way I like it.

That's how it's been for the last 365 days.

Moving onwards.

lucidity check

I dreamt that it was freezing. Perhaps it was winter. Bundled in a heavy jacket, I was still so cold and he offered to warm me up. He assured me that he meant well and took my icy hands in his.

Later I headed to a play, which turned out to be canceled under really absurd circumstances.


Manifestation of daytime thoughts can be quite amusing.

short blues song

I said that I wish to just be a 'hati batu'.

AM told me, that a heart wants what a heart wants.

Haish. This period of the blues must be over soon, soon!

Hati yang tercalar, baiklah segera.

========================

Ok. Reasons for joy.

Boss told me that they're scheduling the interview for next week. Although I'm still waiting for the HR calling letter, am already nervous and in anticipation of the possibilities (amin....). This is one window of opportunity that I don't want to miss, big time!

Puasa month is coming in a few days. As usual, ditto another weight-watching resolution so the baju-baju raya will fit better, and make for better raya pictures, heee. Shopping plans (yg berhemah) ahead, ahoy! Solat terawih every night at the surau shall be a must.

Our theme color for this year baju raya - hijau pucuk pisang. Mamita's pick.

Oh, lovely cheeky nephews Aqif+Amin will be staying with us for the weekend. Bersedialah semua untuk menonton channel kartun sepanjang hujung minggu ;p

di bumi nyata

1.

awak, sampai hati buat saya begitu.

oh, memang. salah saya sebenarnya kerana menyangkakan yang terbaik.

di bumi nyata ini, saya seharusnya berhenti di simpang itu.


2.

this too, shall pass.

i move forward, licking the banoffee pie stickiness off my fingers.


3.

despite my dengue episode, i passed! reason to celebrate.

of light, or none

as much as i'm the uber-idealist and forever focusing on the silver lining in every cloud, sometimes, just sometimes, i could lose hope too.

nothing in particular, as my memory is short.

the road less travelled

if you ask me, yes, actually, i do feel tired sometimes.

but it's of the good kind.

i just learn to not dwell too much on the fact that my weekends are now few and rare in between work/family/classes. all those social outings have taken a backseat. and i make the best out of whatever free days i actually have, which has decreased considerably in number. even public holidays are no guarantee that i wouldn't be in a classroom at sunway by 9am, being lectured on ethic codes, accounting treatments and whatnots or cramming for the next test/exam.

it's alright. it's all for a good cause.

heh, siapa suruh gatal apply for ICAEW?

takde sapa-sapa. saja suka!

ouch

bla bla bla yak yak yak. see.


and still, almost every time, i just hurt myself a bit every time.

i know i shouldn't, and yet like a moth to flame, i threw myself at the very thing that i know will only make me bleed.

for every action, there's a reaction.

i shall stand as long as i can and reach as far as i'm able to.


i suspect i'm a closet that too.
ah, pain.

be still.

the choice is there, all mine to make.

my willpower is weak.

Daremo Shiranai

Dear Kak Min,

I watched Daremo Shiranai again yesterday. And the day I saw it for the first time at LB came to mind. You expected me to cry, and I did buckets!

You had always expected my tears :)

You said, "Those tears come from God".

You were the only person who treat my tears and the fact that when I cry they run into rivers as something not to be ashamed of, and in fact, you made it as if it's a trait to be appreciated.

No, I haven't cried much this year. Not these days. No one suggested good movies to cry at lately, hehe.

Other than at movies? Nah, not there too. Life's good. Nothing that needs to be bawled about.

If you're here, I'd tell you what's new over nasi lemak ayam and Krispy Kreme donuts. But you're not.

Anyways.

There's always prayers to be said, kan.

* Hugs hugs hugs *

oh

Today, what you did, kind of hurt a bit.

What a fool I was to think that there's more to it than the surface.
Today's incident seals the deal on what I've suspected.
So...it's still just not much more than the surface, I suppose.


I really want you to be happy, you know? I thought you already are.
Or maybe you HAD to do what you did simply because doing otherwise would hurt YOU.


Oh well. I shan't let this pull things down anyways.

wonderful life

I wrote in my facebook today : love, is a wonderful experience.

It is.

To have loved, and be loved in return, is the greatest thing you'll ever learn. Haha. From Moulin Rouge (just love that movie, never thought Ewan McGregor could actually sing).

Agreed. Kan, kan.

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The new year has been rather eventful, although it's only mid-February.

Trips that someone made.
Trips that I'll be making.
A fresh start - enrolling to school again after all those years.
Getting into the groove at the new workplace.
Coming to terms with being mundane.
Charting the next course of things for the rest.

And I did away with several credit cards, some of which I barely use anyway (oh it was so satisfying cutting them into little pieces!).

------------

I'm starting to forget how it used to be.
And so I am wary to err.
Coz my heart has been torn to pieces, smashed and burnt.
I gathered the ashes, of which are mixed with clay that I found along the way, and molded it into the shape I best thought it used to be.

Doesn't it look like a brick now?

March forward, brick!

dance

ayo, merajuk la, apa la.

nanti cepat tua meh.

it takes two to tango, true.

but haven't you realize, i don't even know how to dance?

i just walk and hop.

steel

sorry for the outburst. for making you worry.

you know i'm definitely NOT made of steel.

anyways, when i told you i love you, i really meant it.

i'll be back, i promise. just hang tight.

not the best timing, i know, but u can't exactly plan these things now, kan?

hope i didn't spoil your birthday month.

fair

I have wondered before, why is it that God allows me to go through a seemingly easy life so far, in comparison to other people as I know it. Worrying that my comeuppance and big tests would later come too big and perhaps too much.

I know why today.

Because what hurt others at x, will hurt me at the factor of 10 times that.

But I take solace in the faith that God will give you no more than you can bear.